Wednesday, January 28, 2009
I have been thinking alot about how fast little kids grow up - especially mine! It makes me so sad! I like to listen to country music, and unfortunately for me, there are a whole bunch of songs about little kids growing up. These songs always tug at the heartstrings harder than other songs. One that I heard more recently is by Darius Rucker called, "It Won't Be Like This For Long." You can listen to it here. It just makes me realize that, sure it's hard, but it won't always be like this. I have even been told that it won't be this "easy" again!
I like to read about other people's experiences in motherhood. I just finished a book called, "The Mother in Me." It is a collection of stories from mothers in different stages of life. There are some on toddlers, babies, teenagers, adoption, miscarriage - this book is inspired! It tells motherhood how it is. I loved how honest it was. I wanted to share part of it.
This entry is by Emily Halverson. She writes: "For me, the secret of enjoying motherhood is in the moments. To stop and hear the peals of laughter, to touch the tiny hands, to notice the organic smell of their sun-warmed bodies after they come in from playing outside on a hot day--and be deliberate enough to enjoy it all. Who--when they've slowed down enough and have come outside of themselves enough--could not enjoy a child? This is the surest way I know of enjoying motherhood--ENJOYING my children. Taking the time and learning the skill of being present in the moment.
This is my greatest desire and my greatest anxiety--that it's going too quickly and that I've had too many children too fast, to be able to squeeze all the life and love out of these moments that I can. I feel as though I'm in a race against time to suck all of the joyful marrow out of each stage before it's gone."
It captures so much of what I am feeling! Did I have kids to closely together? Am I spending enough "quality" time with each child? Do my kids feel loved? Are they laughing enough? Are there more hugs and kisses than time-outs? Am I letting them be "little?" (another sad country song that I think of every day - hear it here.) Am I teaching them about the Gospel? Do they know how much Heavenly Father and Jesus love them? Do they treat each other nicely? (why is this one so hard?!) Am I remembering every minute of them as "little ones?"
I know this may sound like rambling, but I wanted to write this thoughts down. The last country song I have been thinking alot about is "You're Gonna Miss This." Listen here. When I heard this song, I kept thinking, "I already miss this!" (through the tears, of course). I know I will turn around, and Kaley will be going off to Kindergarten! Then I'll turn around again, and Thomas will be there too! It seems so far away, and yet too close! I feel like I am just digging my heels in and trying to make it stop! But then, I tell my mom today, "I am just done with Thomas being a toddler! Why can't he just pee in the toilet, and stop using a binky!?" How does that work?! Grow up! (But not too fast!)
It reminds me of one of the prettiest songs, but also a sad one. "Where are you going, my little one, little one?...Turn around, and you're grown. Turn around and you're a mother, with babes of your own." Will that really happen? My kids?! With babes of their own!? (tears)
I know that my babies will grow up, and get bigger, and learn new things. This is the plan. I am just learning to go with it, remember all I can, and do my best! I know things will change, but there will be alot that won't change. I will always love these kids. They will (hopefully) always love me. We are a Forever Family. These are the things that matter.
I am also in an "I miss Summer" mood, so the pictures are from Island Park - 8/08, Muldoon - 10/08, and our sunny front porch 6/08. When will Winter end?
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Here is Bella's complimentary cake from Albertsons! They do a free cake for 1 year olds! Thanks for the tip Lesley!
Bella got a little baby from Grandma and Grandpa. It giggles when you squeeze it's tummy! Bella loved it!